When you seek God with a sincere heart that's crying out for a touch from him, He answers you.

Today, I was feeling really insecure about friends, relationships, school, church. I think more so after heated GP discussions (heh). Coming to JC, I don't think I've ever met such a huge amount of people so turned off by Christianity. But God has certainly opened my eyes.

I'll admit, I haven't really been a good girl. I keep putting off QT and in the end, I get too tired to do it. It's not right. I'm gonna try harder this week though. I'm gonna put in more effort into my relationship with God. I'm sick of feeling so conformed to the world. I need to go back to that place that's just God and I.

As I was praying for myself today. I asked God to help me. To help me bring him into focus every single day as I go out and face the world. In all honesty, I'm really sick of hearing words like 'Shit', 'Damn', 'Hell' and a whole assorted vulgar words coming out from my mouth. And I asked God to give me strength. I asked him to give me more tact. To think before I speak. After the prayer, cell lesson was going to start. But just before that, Nicole (Liang) shared a verse that answered my prayer on the spot.

James 1:19-27.

It's a long drawn out passage so I won't type it here. But you know, God really answers your prayers when you're desperate enough. And I think this is the turning point in this seemingly bottomless pit I feel like I'm free falling in. Right now, I'm in a hot air balloon, on a one way ticket out of this pit hole.

God's amazing.